


La Discothèque de Rose

by Lynn1998



Series: Trans-former moi [9]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst, Body Dysphoria, Club AU, Club Fic, Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, F/F, F/M, Genderfluid Marinette, Tons of other characters I'm sure, Trans Adrien, Trigger warning in tags, im it entirely sure how this will end up, self destructive behavior, self hate
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-10
Updated: 2016-07-06
Packaged: 2018-06-01 09:41:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 17,873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6513103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lynn1998/pseuds/Lynn1998
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Adrien has been told he's a girl his entire life and he's accepted it, but how will an encounter with a LGBT teen friendly club change his perspective on…himself?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Ordinary Girl

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! Idk what I'm doing, but this is a multichaptered trans!Adrien fic. Hope you guys enjoy!

     Adrienne Agreste is a famous super model. She is the daughter of Gabriel Agreste, and has excellent talents in fencing, Chinese, piano, violin, ballet, and of course looking beautiful. She exceeds in all of her classes in public school as well as in her home studies arranged by her father. Her shimmering blond hair reaches the top of her chest, and her sharp green eyes could kill a man. Although she was tall for a girl, her polite personality made her shrink down to the optimal expectations. Her warm smile and round cheeks made anyone instantly fall in love with her except for one person. Herself. In fact, Adrienne Agreste doesn't particularly exist. Instead she was a mask. For whom? Himself.

     Adrien Agreste wasn't a girl. He never was, and yet even he was under the impression that he was 100% girl. The truth that was buried deep inside of him never showed, and it would take a long time to weed it out of him. Through the layers of she/her and unwanted stereotypes sits a boy with no clue what the hell was going on. Adrien truly lived life obliviously. Never did he pay attention to his disgust whenever he was called a girl, or his joy when all the girl characters ran out and he "had" to be the guy character. Not once had he thought about the urge to chop off his hair as anything more than a mere act of defiance against his father. And there was no way he figured the reason he felt more comfortable in a sports bra and baggy clothes was because he hated his body. How could he hate his body when the whole of Paris loved him for it? That and his pretty face with full lips and cat-like eyes made him irresistibly perfect.

     Before he could even think about being trans he was rudely confronted with the idea he was a "lesbian". Except…he wasn't? He still liked guys, but girls were so pretty. It took him a long time to even realize he likes girls (like a lot), but that realization was useless since he immediately denied it and got himself a boyfriend right afterwards. Still even when he was with Nathanael his eyes kept wandering towards all the girls in class. Alix was short and spunky with a cute butt. Rose was petite with kissable lips. Juleka was tall and incredibly sexy legs. Mylene was cute and curvy. Alya had a hell of an attitude with a chest that put cantaloupes to shame. Marinette was simply adorable, and it didn't help that she wiggled her butt whenever she got excited or nervous. It especially didn't help that Adrien blatantly stared at her when she did and could feel himself getting gayer. Then again he was already pretty gay…

     Regardless of his desire towards girls he kept his relationship with Nathanael to please his father. Of course his dad supported the LGBT community, but Adrien doubted he would let him come out to the public. The magazines he modeled for gets translated in to a dozen different languages, and the areas they're sold would have a riot over a "lesbian" on the front cover. So he hide it from his father and from himself. Until one day his eyes lingered a little too long on Mari's butt wiggles…

"Distracted by something?" Nino asked. Adrien tore his gaze from the pink denim and blinked at his best friend. Nino and Adrien have been close ever since they met, but with Adrien practically being a "lesbian" they never developed feelings past friendship. Nino on the other hand was asexual and aromatic, so Adrien didn't need to worry about his friend coming on to him because he was a model.

"Huh?"

"You're spending quite some time staring in the general direction of Marinette's butt," Nino teased. Adrien blushed.

"The general direction of Marinette's butt is rather interesting," he murmured and continued staring.

"When are you going to break up with Nathanael and tell him your gay? Because at this rate you're gonna break the poor boy's heart," Nino said. Adrien sighed and reluctantly replaced the heavenly sight of Mari's pink ass with Nino smug face.

"I'm not gay, okay? I still like Nathanael, but I just get…distracted," he replied and already found himself turning his gaze back to the two girls across the court yard.

"Yeah. Distracted. Sure," Nino responded sarcastically and laughed. Adrien's blush deepened and then he sighed.

"Okay, fine. You're right. I'm absolutely not in to Nathanael anymore. Like, at the beginning I kinda liked him, but…I dunno. I think it might be mutual, y'know?" He rambled. Nino nodded.

"He has been spending more time doodling and less time talking. At the start of your relationship he would put down anything he was doing to talk to you," Nino pointed out. Adrien nodded.

"Yeah and the gay thing…" he trailed off and looked longingly over at Marinette's butt again.

"Don't tell anyone," he mumbled and turned red. Nino laughed.

"Man, it must be hard having romantic feelings for someone. I don't even wanna know what it's like having sexual feelings on top of that. That's all just messy!"

"I-I said nothing about sexual feelings!" Adrien hissed and glared at his friend. Nino laughed harder.

"I know you didn't say anything, but you spend more time staring at Mari's ass than literally anything else," he teased. Adrien crossed his arms and poured.

"I'm gonna go break up with Nathanael and get away from you," he announced. Nino rolled his eyes as Adrien turned his heel and walked away.

"Have fun! Tell him to send me a postcard from heartbreak city!" He called. 

     Adrien shook his head and rolled his eyes like his friend did before. He marched his way out to the front of the school and to the bottom step where his boyfriend usually sat during lunch to draw things in nature. Adrien approached the redhead carefully and peered over his shoulder to see the image he was sketching. Lines and value connected to create a window that looked like the one from the building across the street. Nath had even drawn in the reflection from the sun and a cute little bird perched on the windowsill. Adrien smiled and took a seat next to Nathanael. The artist looked up from his drawing and smiled at the blond.

"Hey," he greeted and kissed Adrien's cheek.

"Hey, how's it going?" Adrien replied.

"Pretty good. Better now that you're here," he grinned and laced his fingers with Adrien's. The boy grimaced at his words and nervously but his lip.

"Yeah?"

"Is there something wrong? You look upset," Nath noticed instantly. Adrien sighed and pulled his hand away from him.

"Uh, I dunno if I would say there's something wrong…maybe. I dunno," he mumbled and folded his hands together.

"What to you mean?" Nath asked.

"I…I need to talk to you about something…but it might-"

"Listen…Adrienne…I gotta talk to you about something too," he confessed. Adrien's green eyes snapped over to Nathanael's concerned gaze.

"Huh?" Adrien found himself confused as Nath set down his stuff and turned to face him. The artist to Adrien's hands in his graphite covered fingers and gave him a sympathetic gaze.

"Adrienne. You're one of the best girlfriends I've ever had. You're beautiful and smart and you have a lovely sense of humor…but, I kinda like someone else now," he said. Adrien blinked at the redhead before his face contorted with confusion.

"Wait…what?"

"I'm sorry, Adrienne, but I think we should see other people. Surely there's a ton of male models who are a lot more suitable to be your boyfriend, and I really like this other girl. It's making me feel guilty carrying on this relationship with you," he explained.

"So you're breaking up with me?" He asked. Nathanael nodded.

"I'm really sorry. I still like you, but I really like her, and I don't want to drag you in to a polyamorous relationship that might make you feel uncomfortable."

"Poly-what?"

"Exactly. Anyways, I'm really sorry, but it would hurt you a lot more if I got together with this girl and you found out about it, and I don't wanna hurt you like that," he said and patted Adrien's shoulder.

"Who…who do you like now?" He asked. Nathanael sighed.

"I don't wanna tell you if it's gonna hurt you-"

"No, I-I just really wanna know to see if it's someone who will treat you right," he lied. He was really just a nosey bitch. Nath nodded.

"Okay…its Marinette," he told him. Adrien's blood went cold, and all color left his face.

"M-Marinette?" The one with the really cute butt? The one that Adrien may or may not be crushing on because of said butt?

"Uh, yeah. Is there a problem?"

"N-no! Not at all, I-I just wasn't expecting that," he lied. There was a big problem.

"Oh-"

"I gotta get going, but it was good that we had this chat. I'll see you later. Bye ex-boyfriend," Adrien said and quickly stood up and ran back inside. 

     The moment he entered the school the bell had gone off and everyone was headed back to class after the break. He quickly looked around and bit his lip. On no. He could feel tears starting to gather around his mascara covered eyelashes. The blond dashed for the bathroom and was relieved to see it empty. He stressfully ran his hand through his long blond hair and tried to take some deep breathes before breaking in to sobs. 

     Why was he so upset? It couldn't possibly be because Nathanael broke up with him because he was going to do that anyways. Was it because Nath broke up with him for Mari? Did Mari like Nathanael back? Was this just added competition, or did he even have a chance in the first place? We he just delusional? Was he the only "lesbian" in this goddamn school? How could he possibly think Marinette would like him? His hands trembled as he gripped the edges of the sink and stared at his reflection. Mascara was running down his face as he sobbed. God he was a drama queen. He was so distraught he didn't even notice the sound of the flushing toilet.

"Adrienne?" A soft voice spoke. Shit. He looked through the mirror behind him to see Marinette just coming out of the stalls. His eyes widened with fear before he turned his head away and hid his face in his hands. Damn he was a mess. Mari walked up to the sink next to him and silently washed her hands before grabbing a long sheet of paper towels. She tried off her hands and gently touched Adrien's shoulder. He barely turned over to look at her and nearly whimpered at the sight of her concerned eyes and sympathetic smile.

"What's wrong?"


	2. What are you?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lesbi-honest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna be honest this fic was partly inspired by one of those brothel fics I've been reading. I can't remember the name right now, but I'll add a link in here later. Anyways, I know an LGBT friendly club is very different from a brothel, but I liked the idea of having a set place where the characters all worked at. I really encourage you guys to read it when I find the link, and it'll be easier to see how it inspired this one <3
> 
> (Edit: I found it! http://archiveofourown.org/works/6048379/chapters/13867441 It's one of my favorites. A good mixture of drama and sin, I highly recommend it deserves so much more recognition)

"So he just broke up with you right now?" Marinette asked to clarify. Adrien nodded, wiping the last of his tears before taking a deep breath.

"I was going to anyways…b-but it just hurt more than I expected," he lied. He knew why he was upset, yet he didn't wanna admit it.

"I'm sorry. Boys are dumb. You deserve someone better," Marinette smiled and rubbed Adrien's shoulder comfortingly. He mustered a smile in return and bit his lip.

"Actually…c-can I be honest with you?" He asked. It was probably a bad idea to tell one of the girls he liked that he was absolutely gay. Especially when she was the reason he was so upset at the moment. And yet here he was about to spill the beans.

"Of course you can. I'm here to listen," Mari assured him. He nodded.

"I'm…not super upset he broke up with me. I-I'm actually upset because…he told him he liked another girl and-"

"Oh, you poor girl! That's the absolute worst," she frowned and instantly pulled Adrien in for a tight hug. He turned bright red as she squeezed his torso. He was so gay. He could feel her chest press against his and her face rest nicely in the crook of his neck. His heart was racing and he sternly pushed her back.

"I-I didn't finish," he stuttered.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Go on," she urged. He took another deep breath and let go of her shoulders.

"He said he liked another girl and…i-it was…it was the same girl that I…like too," he finally admitted looking away. Marinette blinked.

"You mean…"

"H-he has a crush on the same girl t-that I have a crush on! I-I like a girl…a-and he likes the same girl," Adrien reiterated turning redder and folding his arms defensively. His shoulders were to his ears and he glared at the sink next to them.

"I'm so sorry, Adrienne…that's-"

"I don't even know if she likes girls! Most likely she'll chose him b-because he's a guy and I-I'm a girl a-and I must be to only freaking…lesbian in this damn school," he snapped. Mari frowned as Adrien tried to hold back his tears again.

"Hey…Adrienne?" Marinette spoke again. He refused to look at her.

"You're not the only one," she informed him. His eyes finally darted over to her as she pulled a small business card out of her pocket.

"There's a place you can go…it's best to go after dark. It's a safe place," she promised. He looked down at the card and cautiously accepted it from Mari's thin fingers. It was light pink with darker pink hearts around the boarder. In the center read an address along with four simple words.

La Discothèque de Rose

 

* * *

 

     Adrien avoided the card Mari have him for a good five days before he typed the address in to google maps. It was about three blocks away from his mansion and easily traveled to by foot. All the pictures has bright pink neon lights illuminating a standard brick building. The description on one of the various review websites out there (Yelp) said it wasn't an obnoxious dance club nor a brothel, yet was a LGBT+ friendly environment that allowed minors. Meaning it didn't sell booze nor did it condone sexual activity within or around the building. A lot of the reviews reported that it was one of the safest places most of these closeted teens have been to including their own homes. 

     It was only until that Sunday did he devise a plan. The website for the club said it was open 24/7, but it had shifts. In the morning it served breakfast which had a pay it forward system where customers could pay for a second meal in advance for homeless queer teens without any money. It also said that queer teens could work for their food and accept minor chores from the boss man. In the afternoon it was usually quiet for kids to do homework and sleep, but once it got dark it was a party zone.

     This information allowed Adrien to plan his exact course of action. An hour before sunset he rummaged through his clothes and set aside a tight black dress and matching heels. He pulled out an old lace veil he wore to his great uncles funeral that he didn't care about, and then promptly went to bed. Nathalie came in around the usual time she does to check up on him for bed, but this time Adrien wasn't actually asleep. Once the assistant had left he instantly spring out of bed and quickly applied dark and heavy makeup and getting dressed in his outfit he had set aside and grabbing his purse. The process had taken a good hour and a half since he messed up on the smokey eye once or twice, but once he got it down he carefully snuck out with his heels in hand so he wouldn't make so much noise.

     Cold air hit his skin as he emerged from the big mansion. He took a deep breath of the clean crisp air and smiled before heading off towards the club. It took him about half an hour to figure out how to get there even with the help of google maps, and even when he did arrive he felt extremely nervous. While his dress wasn't exactly super revealing, it was so tight that he felt uncomfortable. He clutched his shoes and took another deep breath before slipping them on and readjusting his veil. Of course he couldn't be recognized out and about, especially in a gay club incase his father saw. Adrien took a brave step forwards and walked up to the front door. There was a tall burley man leaning next to the door scrolling through his phone when he approached the club entrance. It didn't take like for the man to notice Adrien and smile.

"Good evening. Do you know where you are?" He asked. Adrien nodded, feeling a little at ease from the man's warm expression. He had a nice mustache and bright smiley eyes that could put anyone at ease.

"Y-yes…this is La Discothèque de Rose right?" He replied. The man nodded.

"Yup! What are you?"

"Um…human?"

"Well, we're all human, but what are you?" He repeated.

"E-excuse me?"

"What do you identify as? Are you trans, gay, pan, ace?" He reiterated.

"Oh uh…l-lesbian," she stuttered. He nodded.

"Welcome to La Discothèque de Rose, please enjoy your night," he said and opened the door for him.

     Adrien peered in to the club and notice just how pink it was. The photos didn't do it justice. There was pink and red and purple lights everywhere that set a misty haze over the scene. The music wasn't too loud, and it was poppy yet casual at the same time. There was no set dress code, and it showed in the crowd. Inside people were dressed from sweatpants to dresses to full on tuxedoes. He carefully stepped inside and glanced around at all the dancing people. It was hot and misty, and Adrien was instantly thankful for his choice of such a small and tight dress. He eyed the people around him and noticed lingering gazes on him as well. It seemed his veil and heavy eye makeup hide his identity well enough. No one shouted his name or looked at him like they recognized him. They only looked at him like they thought he was hot…which he was.

"What's a beautiful masterpiece like you doing in a place like this," hummed a low voice. Adrien looked over and blushed when he saw a tall androgynous person standing next to him. Their eyes looked him up and down as they bit their lip and rested their hand on their hip. Their hair was in a low pony and their nails were painted silver with intricate black crosses.

"You must be new here, honey," they continued.

"S-sorry, I'm not looking f-for-"

"A date? Of course you're not. You're here to have fun and feel safe," they interrupted.

"U-um…y-yeah," Adrien stuttered. The person giggled and patted Adrien's shoulder.

"Don't worry, I won't hit on you any more. So what are you?"

"Oh um lesbian," Adrien replied, proud of himself for catching on to the lingo.

"Nice, so you wouldn't be interested in me…unless you don't know anything else beside gay, lesbian, and bi…"

"Bi?" Adrien questioned.

"Thought so. Bisexual is when you're attracted to two or more genders," they explained.

"More…genders?" Adrien was extremely confused. The person laughed loudly.

"I can explain it to you all later. I imagine you came here for a good time and not a lecture about sexualities and gender identities."

"Who are you again?" He asked.

"Raven. At your service," they announced and held out their hand. Adrien carefully took ahold of Raven's hand and shook it.

"And you?" They asked.

"Oh um…my name…i-is…Chatte Noire," he lied. Raven giggled.

"I see. You wanna keep it secret. Cute name, it goes with your outfit."

"Thanks…"

"Anyways, let me take you to Ladybug. I'm sure she'll be happy to properly welcome you to the club. She can also tell you a lot more about that stuff I mentioned earlier if you're curious," Raven said and kept Adrien's hand in theirs. Adrien was about to pull away when the person dragged them through the crowd. The blond barely made his way with his heels as he protested and tried to wiggle his hand out. Raven merely shushed him and continued onward though the dancing crowd. When they finally made their way to the front Adrien grumbled and fixed his dress as he glared at Raven.

"Sorry, pal. It's really easy to lose someone in a crowd like this," they apologized.

"Doesn't mean you have to drag me through at 500 mph," he complained.

"Honestly, Raven, is that anyway to treat our guest?" Spoke a strong and sassy voice.

     Adrien looked up to see a small girl at the foot of the stage that the DJ was performing on. Her hair was tied with red ribbons and her body was adorned in a red top with black polka dots and red skinny jeans. Her sneakers were black with red laces, and on her face she wore a red mask with the same pattern as her shirt. She smiled and put her hands on her hips.

"Welcome to La Discothèque de Rose. My name is Ladybug."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case some of you missed the silver nail polish w/black crosses Raven is Juleka <3


	3. What's cooler than being cool? Gay

"I think you broke her," Raven spoke as Adrien gapped at Ladybug. She giggled and stepped closer to the stunned boy.

"I wouldn't be surprised. What is she?"

"I-I'm a l-lesbian," Adrien stuttered feeling weak at the knees. Ladybug looked him up and down and smiled.

"Not for long. I believe you just became bi…or possibly pan," she told him.

"P-pan…?"

"Pansexual or pan-romantic is someone who experiences attraction to all genders," she explained.

"I-I still don't get that…are there more than two genders?" He asked.

"You're looking at all of them right now basically," Ladybug giggled.

"Huh?"

"Raven, why don't you attend to other guests, I have a lot to explain to…"

"C-Chat Noire," Adrien answered.

"Hm, cute name."

"Thanks…"

"Anyways, Raven."

"Got it, Buggy-bot. See ya later," they waved and went off.

"C'mon, let's go downstairs and sit down to chat," Ladybug suggested taking Adrien's hand in her own.

"O-okay." Adrien obediently followed her through the crowd and downstairs to an even bigger room under the club.

     The music still wasn't overbearingly loud, and it was actually a lot more spaced out. There were circular tables lining the sides with chairs and menus like a restaurant. Ladybug guided him down the tall stairs and through the second crowd until they got to a table. He sat down across from her and she folded her hands over the table.

"So…you don't know about the other genders," she stated. He nodded.

"Well, to simply put it gender isn't simple. To your knowledge there's boys and then there's girls, and it's completely divided and it's very black and white," she started. He nodded again.

"In reality, gender is a spectrum. Just like sexuality and romantic orientation, but I'll get in to that later. Gender isn't black and white. Gender isn't even a grayscale. It's a giant variety of color. There's a lot of identities out there, but I'll explain what non-binary is to you."

"Non…binary. Is that literally a gender?"

"Yes and no. It's an umbrella term for gender neutral and gender non-conforming people as well as a gender identity. So it's both."

"Okay…but like how do you know?"

"It's hard to tell. It's really dependent on who you are. Sometimes it just doesn't feel right when someone referees to you as your designated gender given to you by the doctor, and you have to find out what makes you feel comfortable."

"Oh."

"For example, me. I'm not a girl. I don't identify as a girl. I'm gender fluid," she announced. Adrien's eyebrows shot up.

"Y-you're…h-how does that work?"

"You're probably wondering how this works biologically. Don't. Gender is separate from biological sex," she clarified. He nodded in understanding.

"So, gender fluid…what's that?"

"It means my gender identity changes. It changes a lot actually. Sometimes I feel like a girl, or a boy, or something in between. Actually I don't even know what my gender is sometimes," she said and laughed a little. He laughed too.

"So…when you said I'm not a lesbian anymore…" Adrien trailed off with wide eyes. Ladybug grinned and leaned over the table on her elbows.

"I mean if you're attracted to me in anyway…there's no way you're interested in just girls," she said in a low sensual voice. It sent shivers up his spine as she giggled and slid off the chair. She held out her hand to Adrien.

"C'mon, let's dance," she urged. He glanced at her hand and then back at her. Adrien couldn't help but feel like he's been in a similar situation. The blond cautiously took her hand and stood up from his chair to follow her to the dance floor.

     Ladybug was an angel. Adrien thought he was gay for Marinette, but Ladybug was also dangerously close to capturing his heart. His eyes remained on her figure as they approached the middle of the dance floor. Once she stopped she turned to face him and grinned as the music pulsed through the club. He could feel his heartbeat sync with the tempo as Ladybug started to sway her hips. He must've been to distracted to response because soon she had her hands on his hips and was swaying them with hers. He quickly followed her lead and even found himself smiling and blushing nervously. When he glanced down to their feet he saw that she was moving hers. He quickly kicked off his heels and tried to mimic her movements. Of course he stumbled a couple times, but they only laughed it off and continued to dance. Ladybug grabbed both his hands and moved her body in such intricate ways that he could only gawk at her.

     She noticed Adrien's intense stare as she danced and gave him a flirtatious smirk before leaning close. Her body was mere inches away from Adrien, and she let go of his hands to touch his waist and settle on his hips. His eyes bulged down at her as she grinned wider and reached up to run her fingers through his hair and wrap her arms around his neck. Before he could make sense of what was happening her lips were pressed against his. The moment he felt the soft texture of her skin he pulled back and turned completely red.

"I-I can't I-I've never d-done this-"

"Shh…don't think, just feel," Ladybug whispered holding her finger to his lips. 

     He furrowed his brows, yet accepted her next kiss regardless. She gently cupped his face and tilted her head to fit better with his. Adrien's heart felt like it was going to fly away. Never in his life has he actually kissed a girl…although Ladybug told him she wasn't a girl. Never in his life has he kissed anyone besides boys. While he didn't exactly feel nothing when he kissed boys, kissing Ladybug felt like heaven on earth. The way she pressed her lips against his over and over again made him feel like he could get drunk off of her affection. Without even realizing it his hands were on her waist and under her loose fitting shirt. Her thumb caressed his cheek as they parted for breath and instantly dove back in. Soon enough he felt her hot tongue and nearly melted at her touch. He made a noise of approval as she tangled her fingers in his hair near his roots and lightly scrapped her nails on his scalp.

     The second time they broke for air Adrien was desperate to have her back again. He followed her when she pulled back and hovered his mouth over hers. Her hot breath on his bottom lip made him bite it and lean in for more. His hands gripped her waist and held her body close to his while he continued his mouth against hers. A giggle escaped those heavenly lips of hers as she pressed her chest against his. His brain went numb as he let his lips do the talking, and by talking he meant making out. Ladybug had to push him back to stop him and giggled again when he turned bright red.

"I-I…um…s-sorry!" He stuttered and took his hands off of her waist. She laughed.

"No need to apologize, kitty. Although it seems to be me who has the cats tongue," she teased and tapped his nose. He wrinkled it and blinked at her.

"I've never…kissed anyone b-besides boys," Adrien confessed. Ladybug hummed and rewrapped her arms around his neck.

"Then you better get some more practice in."

 

* * *

 

     Adrien stared up at his ceiling while he clutched his pillow. His previous activities were replaying in his head over and over again. The memory of Ladybug's lips sent his heart racing for more. When he had to depart he was more than disappointed. It was really late, but he couldn't get back to sleep. He was in his baggiest teeshirt and sweatpants with his tightest sports bra and his loosest pair of underwear. He had just gotten out of the shower and kept his hair up in a bun. Everything felt comfortable for once, but for some reason he couldn't catch a wink of sleep. His mind was still too preoccupied by Ladybug.

     She reminded him of Marinette. There was an uncanny similarity between their eyes and their hair, but he still couldn't tell looking at the mask. Ladybug could be anyone. Surely Marinette would've mentioned being genderfluid or something around him since they were…friends? He couldn't tell if she considered him her friend at all. He really hoped she did because if she didn't he was far from trying to get her to like him back.

     The blond sighed as he heard his phone vibrate and turned to check it. Across his was a message from Nathanael. He always messages him late when he couldn't sleep. For some reason even after nearly a week since their breakup they still chatted frequently. Adrien mostly wanted to keep track of Nathanael's progress with Marinette, but also because they were still friends after their breakup. He didn't even like him that way anyways. Adrien opened his phone and his eyes widened at the message in front of him.

N: I think I'm gonna tell Marinette I like her…tomorrow


	4. Met someone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey friends, I added some stuff to the tags so incase you don't like that stuff you can unfollow now before you get too invested. I'd hate to trigger something because of lack of tags, and this story got a little darker than I intended. It won't show up for a couple more chapters, so for now it's not so ansty and stuff.

     Adrien ignored the text message and instead pushed his phone away and instantly attempted to sleep. Of course it wasn't as successful as he had hoped but at least he got a little bit of sleep. When he woke up his eyes still felt extremely heavy from his extravagant smokey eye last night, but he put on his usual makeup anyways along with his contacts. He braided his now dry hair and groaned at the thought of putting on a regular bra. It never crossed his mind that he didn't _have_ to do all of that, but he was still under the impression the he did. He slipped on a pair of tight high-waisted jeans and tucked his grey tank top under it before sighing as he looked at his reflection.

"Gross," he muttered.

     He felt gross. Everything he saw in the mirror made him stomach churn. He couldn't figure out why, but the sight of his nearly perfect hourglass figure made him sick. The feeling of his heavy breasts in his bra made him unbelievably uncomfortable, and his jeans made him feel like a piece of meat waiting to be chewed on. He hated it, but he knew it's what would make his father proud. So he sighed and sucked it up before finishing off with a pink cardigan, a simple necklace, and some pink flats.  
Breakfast was quick and painless, and before he knew it he was at school. The first thing he saw was Alya, Nino, and Marinette at the front of the school. He smiled at his group of friends and blushed when Marinette waved so enthusiastically. When he joined their group she blushed and shyly tucked a piece of hair over her ear.

"Good morning, Adrienne. How are you?" She greeted. His cheeks turned pink as well as he nervously smiled back at her.

"Oh, um…I-I'm okay. How are you?" He responded.

"I'm okay," she replied. He nodded, and Alya and Nino were watching intently.

"I really like your hair like that. It's really pretty," Marinette complimented. Adrien had forgotten about throwing his hair in a messy braid this morning.

"Oh, this? I just did this really quick this morning," he murmured.

"I think it looks really nice," Mari smiled. Adrien could've died right there. Holy shit she was so cute.

"T-thank…you," he trailed off as he noticed Nathanael approaching their group. All color left his face as Adrien suddenly remembered Nathanael's text message last night.

"Um, excuse me," he said and quickly marched over to Nathanael.

"Oh, um…bye," Mari muttered as Adrien walked off.

"I'll talk to you later!" He called looking back as he continued to walk off. When he turned around he stopped since he was right in front of Nathanael. He kinda liked that he was taller than the red head.

"Good morning, Adrienne. You look nice today," Nath said.

"Uh, t-thanks."

"If you'll excuse me, I'd like to talk to Mari-"

"W-wait! Hold on," Adrien nearly begged. Nathanael lifted a brow.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"Um…" Adrien nervously licked his lips and glanced back at his group of friends. The three of them were conversing and not paying attention to the ex-couple.

"C-can we talk? In private please?" He nearly begged. Nathanael glanced between him and the group before sighing.

"Alright," he allowed. Adrien nodded and lead him away and behind the stairway.

"Okay, listen I have something I need to-"

"Are you jealous?" Nathanael asked. Adrien blinked.

"Uh…what?"

"Are you jealous?" He repeated.

"Uh jealous of what…er, who?" Adrien asked.

"Marinette, of course. You always avoid her in conversations and now you're stopping me from confessing to her? Are you scared she'll like me back?" He questioned. Adrien blushed and hesitated before nodding.

"Yes…yes I'm deathly afraid that she'll like you back because you're a boy and-ugh! This isn't what you think though-"

"Then what is it?" Nathanael challenged.

"I'm not jealous of Mari, okay? I…w-when you broke up with me I-I was also planning on breaking up with you because I also like someone else," he told him vaguely.

"Okay. Who?"

"Uhm…i-it's actually really funny um…we k-kinda have a crush on the same girl," he stuttered. Nathanael's eyes widened and Adrien avoided the shocked turquoise color.

"You…have a crush on Marinette?" Nathanael asked. Adrien hesitated and then nodded as he scratched the back of his neck nervously and blushed.

"You…you're…"

"I'm gay. Yeah," he murmured.

"Holy shit, Adrienne. No wonder you were distant! I stopped liking you because it felt like you didn't like me anymore!" He nearly shouted.

"Shh! Keep it down!" Adrien hissed.

"Sorry, but…holy shit this is crazy! Who else knows?"

"Nino and Marinette…that's it," he answered.

"Damn. That's one hell of a secret. Uh…sorry dude, but I can't let your crush on Mari hold me back. If she doesn't roll that way it's hopele-"

"No no no! That's not what this is about. After you broke up with me I got emotional about that and how she'll probably go out with you because you're a boy and I'm a girl, and…s-she comforted me."

"Mari?"

"Yeah, and…I told her how you liked another girl and that I liked the same girl so if you tell her that you like her…t-then she'll know I like her too," he explained.

"Jesus Christ, Adrienne," he groaned.

"I'm sorry, okay? I-I needed someone to talk to and she helped me. I didn't think you would confess to her!"

"Why would you not think that?"

"You're kind of extremely shy," he pointed out. Nathanael blushed.

"T-that's beside the point," he grumbled.

"Anyways. I know that I can't control you, but please don't tell her yet. I'd die of embarrassment! S-she can't know that I like her," he begged.

"Why?"

"Because it's just pathetic, y'know? It feels like…I-I'm the only one," he muttered. Nathanael put his hand on Adrien's shoulder and the blond looked at him.

"Adrienne, there are other people out there going through the same thing you are. You're not alone, okay?" He told him. He nodded as Nath reached in to his pocket and pulled out a little business card.

"There are other people like you, y'know?" He said as he pushed the card in to Adrien's hand.

"I won't tell Mari until you're comfortable, okay?" He assured him before walking off. Adrien watched the redhead walk away and back inside the school building. When he glanced down at the card he wasn't surprised to see dark pink hearts bordering four simple words.

Le Discothèque de Rose

 

* * *

 

"Adrienne, are you okay?" Nino asked. The blond lifted his head from his desk and blinked over at his friend.

"Uh…I'm fine," he lied.

"Shut up, you're lying. What's wrong?" He insisted. Adrien sighed.

"There's this…club I went to last night," he murmured. Nino lifted a brow.

"A club?" He asked. Adrien pulled out the second pink card he had received and handed it to his friend.

"It's an LGBT teen friendly club, and I went last night," he told him.

"Oh…did you have fun?"

     Adrien blushed when he thought about last night. He could never forget Ladybug's giggle, or her beautiful sapphire blue eyes, or the way her voice sounded before she kissed him. His cheeks got even hotter when he thought about the kiss…er kisses. Her lips were so soft and unlike anything he's ever experienced in his life. It was amazing. She was amazing.

"Y-yeah. I had a lot of fun, but I can't decide if I should go again tonight," he said.

"Well it's teen friendly, right? I'm guessing no drugs no sex and whatever?"

"Yeah."

"Then it seems rather safe and harmless. Unless you're scared about someone recognizing you," he pointed out.

"I already got that sorted out," Adrien told him.

"Oh? Like a disguise?"

"Exactly. Like really heavy makeup and stuff. No one could tell who I was last night," he answered. Nino nodded.

"Well. It seems completely safe, and you said you had a lot of fun. I don't see why you shouldn't go."

"Because my dad doesn't know, and I had to sneak out last night," he replied.

"Oh, I see. You're nervous about breaking your old man's rules. Don't worry about it. You're a teenager who is discovering herself. It's not like you're doing anything dangerous. Besides, sneaking out is a natural and normal part of being an adolescent," he assured him. Adrien sighed again.

"Thanks…"

"If you don't mind me asking, what made last night so much fun?" Nino inquired. Adrien looked down at his desk and smiled a little.

"I met someone."


	5. Available

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More Ladybug and Chat Noire interactionS and some discothèque back story

     Marinette sighed as she sat in front of her mirror. She had smudged red eyeshadow around her eyes to blend in with her mask, and she was working on tying her ribbons in her hair. Juleka, aka Raven, hummed as they messed around with their hair behind her and settled on a nice looking man-bun type thing. The two of them were silent. That was just how they worked. Being the only two genderfluid individuals on staff they had a unique relationship that was built around casual silence and comfortable teasing and chatting. There were other genderqueer people who worked at La Discothèque de Rose, but none of them were explicitly genderfluid. There was someone who was genderflux, and then a few agenders, and of course a bunch of straight up trans people.

     The only none-queer people were Marinette's parents who owned and managed the place. They only worked part time considering the bakery they ran as well, but Marinette was happy to manage the Discothèque all the time if they needed. There were some nights when her father maned the door such as the previous nights. Other than that usually one of their more lean workers did. Sometimes her mother cooked the breakfasts served and sold in the mornings, and on the weekends Marinette did it instead. Anything that wasn't sold at the bakery was given out for free to the teens on Fridays, and with all the volunteers and kids working for their meals they were never short on staff. The only problems they ran in to would be the occasional egging, but they would just clean it off and brush it off.

     The Dupain-Chengs always had a special place in their hearts for the LGBT community. It was only when Marinette discovered herself and shared with her parents did they think of a safe place for others like her to go. It wasn't hard to get an abandoned building, and with a small loan from the bank they were on their way to creating a safe haven for LGBT teens all over Paris. Of course with the staff handing out cards to every queer kid they come across they were never truly empty. There was always a friendly face somewhere in each room at all times. Sometimes there was an unfriendly face, but they always found a way to peacefully escort them out. Other times there were more than friendly faces…

"Do you think that pretty blond will be back tonight?" Juleka asked as they fixed their blazer and smirked at Marinette through the mirror. Mari shrugged.

"Maybe."

"Maybe? Is that a hopeful maybe?" They questioned.

"Maybe…" Mari murmured and evened out her ribbons.

"Hm, what are you going to do? You've had a crush on Adrienne for so long, but suddenly Chatte Noire has swept away your interest?" Juleka hummed and applied the lipstick.

"It's nothing serious. The poor girl didn't even know about trans people. I was just showing her what else was out there for her. Chatte Noire seems like a nice girl, but everyone knows Adrienne is the one who has stolen my gay heart," she assured them. Juleka chuckled.

"Alright. If you say so. Be careful. Something tells me Chatte Noire has a really big crush on you," they warned. Mari shrugged and plucked her mask from the nail it was hanging on next to the mirror.

"She'll get over me. Besides I don't think she'll be here tonight," she said and fit her mask perfectly on her face.

"If you say so," they sighed.

"Where's Nathanael? His shift is tonight," she muttered. Juleka checked their phone.

"He's running a little late, but he'll be here," they assured her.

"He better get his bi little butt over here soon because it's almost dark outside," she grumbled.

"You stress too much," Juleka said and tucked their phone away.

"Whatever. Go make out with your girlfriend," Mari said and stood up to follow her out of the room.

"Rose isn't on tonight. She's on tomorrow night," they reminded her.

"Then make out with her tomorrow night!" She called with a smile as they parted ways.

"Will do!" Juleka giggled and made their way towards the downstairs area. Marinette chuckled herself and made her way to the main dance floor to find the usuals already hanging around. The DJ was still setting up while they were pouring themselves some soda that they brought.

"Theo! Tony! So nice to see you again," she grinned as she approached the two boys.

"Hey! Always a pleasure to see the one and only Ladybug," Tony smiled and hugged her.

"Aw you're too sweet," she said and then hugged Theo.

"And where is Tony without his Theo? You guys are too cute." Theo blushed and accepted Ladybug's hugged.

"How's the art going? Still painting portraits of your beau?" She teased. Theo laughed and scratched the back of his neck.

"Yeah. Sorry Lady, but he's a better muse for me than you," he smiled.

"Oh no! I'm wounded because you like to draw your boyfriend more than me!" She cried dramatically. They all laughed.

"I'm happy you found yourself a better muse," she winked before walking off to the DJ and checking the sound with him.

     The night went on as it usually did. All the usual people came and enjoyed their time in the bright pink and purple lights while Ladybug managed and made sure no one was getting hurt. There were a few newbies as usual, but they got along by themselves just fine. It was always nice to see new faces in the crowd as well as familiar ones as well. Marinette really felt close with the community she had built with this club. It filled her with joy to think that she could offer some safety and peace of mind to kids who felt the same way she did. A sigh left her lips as she leaned against the door frame in front of the employees only sign.

     As expected it was a little less busy considering it was a school night, but even when it wasn't super busy it still felt booming with activity. Her blue eyes scanned the room until they suddenly snagged on blond hair and black cat ears peaking through the crowd. Marinette had to blink a couple times before blue connected with green and she suddenly found herself staring at Chat Noire. A grin spread across the blond's face as she made his way through the crowd. The closer she got the clearer Marientte could see what she was wearing. Skin tight black leather jeans paired with a black crop top that hid her chest much like last night. She wore the same veil paired with smokey eye makeup and even black fingerless gloves. This time instead of heels she wore black sneakers, but that didn't matter because she was still taller than her anyways.  
Marinette couldn't tell if she wanted her to come over or not. On one had she always welcomed people new to the community with opened arms. On the other hand the memories from last night was stirring up some emotions she would rather not address. She loves Adrienne. Not Chat Noire.

"You're back," Mari said as Chat came up next to her. She smirked.

"I was eager to return after last night," she replied and leaned her arm against the wall. Ladybug scoffed.

"What's that supposed to mean?" She asked. Chat shrugged.

"I enjoyed your company. Is that a crime?" She responded.

"Depends on how much you enjoyed it," Ladybug murmured. Chat chuckled and turned to lean her back against the wall.

"Arrest me now then because I enjoyed it quiet a bit," she said. Ladybug chuckled.

"Sorry to disappoint you, Kitty. I'm not available," she said. The blond shifted her weight against the wall and hummed.

"Did someone beat me to it or have you been unavailable for a while?" She asked.

"Unavailable for a while," she murmured.

"So who's the lucky someone?" Chat asked. Ladybugs heart stopped. Shit. She wasn't prepared to answer that question.

"Uh…n-no one you know…t-thats for sure," she stuttered. Chat looked over at her and lifted a brow. Ladybug blushed and looked away from her.

"Really? Then can you describe him or her?"

"Ugh, it's so much easier to just say them," she grumbled.

"Huh?"

"Instead of saying 'describe him or her' say 'describe them'."

"Uh…can you describe them?" Chat still looked a little confused. Ladybug sighed.

"They and them are gender neutral pronouns. If you don't know a persons gender it's more polite to use those pronouns until they tell you which pronouns they prefer," she explained.

"Oh, that actually makes sense," Chat agreed.

"Anyways, do you mind describing them to me?"

"Uh…w-well…she actually pretty similar to you," Ladybug confessed.

"Oh?"

"She also has blond hair and green eyes…but she's polar opposite personality wise."

"How so?" Chat asked.

"Um, for one she's rather shy…unlike you. She's very smart and she's pretty and…god I've liked her for forever," she sighed. Chat frowned.

"Are you guys dating or…" she trailed off. Ladybug blushed again and fixed her hair behind her ear.

"Um…n-no…I really doubt she likes me. I recently found out she's in to girls, b-but there's probably better options out there," she said. Chat noticed the sad tone of her voice. The blond turned to face her and lifted her chin so blue connected to green.

"You're amazing, Ladybug. She'd be crazy not to like you back," Chat spoke softly as she stared down at Ladybug. She blinked up at Chat and smiled.

"Don't tell me kitty has a crush," she teased. Chat chuckled a little.

"Would it be the end of the world if I did?" The blond murmured as she leaned closer.

"Y'know cats eat bugs, right?" Ladybug asked. Chat chuckled.

"That explains why I wanna eat you right up," she teased. Ladybug rolled her eyes and looked away so Chat wouldn't see her blush, but the fingers under her chin directed her gaze back to those intense green gems.

"Careful, kitty. Something tells me you don't know what you're getting yourself in to," Ladybug warned. Chat thought for a moment before smiling.

"What's the fun in knowing?"


	6. Bittersweet without a lot of sweet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How disappointing.

     Adrien sighed at the sound of his alarm. The heavy makeup for the previous night bothered him less than the last time, but still bothered him nonetheless. He accidentally hit the snooze button before rolling out of bed and wiping off the excess eyeliner from the previous night. His brain was still groggy, but he continued on anyways. He went through the same mundane routine he usually did. Brush hair. Simple makeup. Contacts. Do hair. Get dressed. Hate self. The usual.

"Another day filled with disappointment," he sighed as he looked at his reflection. 

     He had decided to go with a braid like yesterday, but instead decided to hate himself more than usual and wear a dress. He seldom liked dresses, and when he did it was only for a certain amount of time. Dresses were fun when he felt flirty and mercilessly seductive. Unfortunately today was not one of those days, but he always tried to wear a dress once a week ever since his dad made a comment about him wearing pants for an entire month. It was tiring, but necessary in his eyes. As long as he didn't need to have another talk with his dad about his fashion choices he was happy.

     When he arrived at school he greater Nino with a mere nod and a tired smile. His friend noticed immediately, but when he asked about it Adrien just told him he was tired. Of course Nino suspected that wasn't the full story, but decided to let it go. It seemed he had forgotten about the minor detail Adrien told him yesterday. At least to Adrien it seemed that way. It also seemed to Adrien that Marinette also had a tired expression across her pretty face. He tried to peek behind him every now and then and always caught a glimpse of her either yawning or napping. It was adorable to see her fast asleep on her desk, and endearing when she was woken up and blinking at the board. 

     His joy was kinda ruined when Nathanael peeked over Ivan's shoulder from the back of the room and made eye contact with the blond. He frowned. Oh yeah. He needed to fix that. When lunch rolled around he told Nino and Alya to go ahead without them since Marinette was fast asleep once again. They left with friendly goodbyes, and Adrien was free to wake Mari up and set things…straight.

"Mari? Are you awake?" He asked gently as he carefully shook her shoulder. She moaned tiredly before lifting her head and rubbing the sleep from her eyes.

"Hmm…Ayla?" She murmured.

"Close, but not quite," Adrien joked. Marinette looked up and instantly made eye contact with his green color. She snapped fully awake and nearly jumped out of her seat.

"A-Adrienne! I-I'm sorry! You didn't need to wake me up!" She apologized profusely. Adrien chuckled a little. She was so cute.

"Don't worry. It was nothing. I…I actually wanted to talk to you about something," he confessed.

"Oh, um…y-yeah! Anything you want, I'm here to listen," she said with a cheerful smile. He nodded.

"That's…that means a lot…um…you remember a week or so ago you found me really upset in the bathroom?"

"Yes, I remember that. What's wrong? Did something happen?" She asked.

"Uh, kinda. Y'see I had a talk with Nathanael and it turns out I got really confused. We don't like the same girl. We actually like two different girls. It was all just a misunderstanding," he explained.

"Oh, really? I'm glad to hear that. Hopefully you'll now have a chance with whoever it is you have feelings for," she smiled and stood up. Adrien laughed nervously.

"I dunno. She…I can't tell if she likes girls or not…" he mumbled.

"Well…do you mind telling me who it is?" Mari asked. Adrien blushed.

"Uh, n-no! I mean um I'm too embarrassed," he replied. Mari took a step closer.

"Are you sure? I won't make any judgements. I could tell you if I think she would like you back," she spoke in a steady voice as she gazed up in to his peridot eyes. Adrien blinked.

"Um…I-I'm sure-" he was cut off by his surprise when she moved even closer.

"That's too bad, because I already know a girl who does like you. If you happened to like the same girl…then that would be just great, right?" She was close. Almost too close. Adrien could see every freckle flicked across her face, and he could see every line in her chapped lips. Her blue eyes were ten times more sparkly up close, and she smelled like bread.

"Um…w-who is it?" He asked.

"I dunno if I should tell you without knowing who you like. S-she's very easily flustered, and kinda shy. But she's very cute with pretty eyes and a cute butt if I'm being completely honest," she winked and stepped even closer. 

     Adrien couldn't speak with her so close. He could easily kiss her with one shift of his head. His head felt dizzy from how intoxicating her presence was. He so desperately wanted to reach out and feel her soft skin. He wanted to kiss her like Ladybug had kissed him. He swallowed hard and tried his best not to surge forward and drown her with kisses. She obviously didn't like him if she was talking to him about someone else she could set him up with.

"Sorry, but I doubt who you're talking about is the same person I like," he managed. Mari's smile faltered.

"Oh…I see," she took a step back.

"That's too bad," she said and looked away nervously.

"Yeah…sorry," he murmured.

"Adrienne? Where are yo-" Nathanael was yelling as he burst in to the classroom. He noticed the two of them together and stopped talking at the sight of their red cheeks.

"Nathanael?" Mari spoke.

"Oh, hi M-Mari. Um I have to borrow Adriennne from you for a little bit," he said.

"Okay. We were about finished talking anyways, right?" Mari asked. Adrien nodded.

"I'll chat with you another time," he told her before walking off to join Nathanael.

"See ya, Mari!" Nath called as they walked out the classroom together. They got down to the courtyard when they started to talk.

"Okay, did you set things straight?" Nathanael inquired. Adrien nodded.

"Yeah. I told her it was a misunderstanding and that we actually like different girls," he replied.

"What did she say?"

"She…she asked me who it was, and told me that she knew a girl who likes me. She said that if I wanted to know I should tell her who I like to make sure she didn't embarrass her friend."

"Damn…if you want, I could try and fish it out of her for you-"

"No, it's okay," he interrupted.

"Hey, are you okay?" Nath asked. Adrien sighed.

"If…if she liked me…she wouldn't have suggested this other girl. Would she?" Adrien murmured. Nathanael blinked in surprise.

"Um…I-I dunno."

"Because if she did like me…what would she do? Ugh this is so confusing," he whimpered and rubbed his temples.

"Hey, Adrienne, don't worry about it, okay? I know that you really like Marinette and all, but it's not the end of the world if she doesn't like you back. Whether it's in two weeks or two years I can guarantee you'll find a nice girl who will love you and understand exactly what you're going through," Nath comforted as he wrapped his arms around Adrien's shoulders. He mustered a smile and laughed a little as he felt tears start to well up.

"S-sorry…I'm just…a crybaby," he sniffled.

"Hey, it's okay. School is confusing and teenagers are confusing. Things will work out, and being a crybaby isn't necessarily a bad thing. You'll be okay," he assured him. Adrien nodded and turned to give Nathanael a hug. The redhead returned Adrien's embrace and squeezed him comfortingly.

"You'll be okay," he murmured once more.

"Thanks, Nath…I hope things go well with you and Mari."

 

* * *

 

     Adrien stayed home that night. He didn't feel like putting in the effort to look like Chat Noire, nor did he have the energy to try and converse with people in the club. Instead he stayed home and snuck an entire bucket of ice cream from the freezer and watched cheesy chick flicks on his couch. He was bundled up like a little snowball in his blanket, and half of the container of chocolate brownie thunder ice cream was completely eaten. His leftover mascara ran down his face, but he didn't pay much attention. He didn't care. The only thing that could make him care would be if-

"Adrienne?"

     The blond whipped his head around to see his father standing in his doorway. All color left his face as he realized there was probably chocolate smeared all over it. He quickly stumbled out of the blanket and wiped his face.

"I-I'm sorry! I-I'll never eat it again! I'll skip my cheat day this month a-and I'll make sure to exercise twice as much tomorrow and-"

"Darling, what's wrong?" Gabriel asked as he walked in to the room. Adrien quickly shut off the TV and handed his father the half eaten tub of ice cream.

"N-nothing!" He stuttered as he grabbed his blanket and carried it over to his bed.

"Adrienne," his voice sent shivers down his spine. That was his warning voice he only used if he wanted him to do something then and there. Adrien sighed and turned around to face him. He kept his gaze on the floor as he fiddled with his fingers behind his back.

"I like this…guy…and he doesn't like me back," he murmured, dressing it up so Gabriel wouldn't know his orientation.

"I see…I'm sorry. I don't know why anyone wouldn't…um like you," he consoled. Adrien looked up at his dad. He was obviously uncomfortable with addressing Adrien's emotions. It was probably because he didn't know much about "girls", but also because he doesn't know much about emotions either. Adrien nodded.

"Thanks dad," he murmured.

"You should get some rest. It takes a lot of energy to go through such a heartbreak," he advised. Adrien nodded.

"Thanks dad…goodnight…"

"Goodnight, sweetheart."


	7. I will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A confession, a haircut, and pain

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: anorexia, over-exercising, self loathing

     Marinette blinked up at Nathanael. What he had just said was the most disappointing sentence she had ever heard. While that sounded rather harsh, she couldn't deny the sense of dread and just plain shitty-ness.

"Marinette? I…I like you," the redhead confessed. He looked like he was trembling from the amount of nerves he had. It made Marinette feel awful.

"Um…what was that?" She asked, begging for him to say something else.

"I said that I like you…Marinette," he repeated. Oh no. Mari knit her brows in concern. Oh geez. She fiddled with the strap of her purse.

"Oh…I-I see…um, I'm very flattered, Nath, but…um…"

"Before you say anything I just wanted to clear up that me and Adrienne are over. She's a wonderful girl and all, and I know lately we've been talking more and such, but we're not getting back together. I broke up with her because I started to like you and…I-I don't wanna force anyone in to a polyamorous relationship they wouldn't be comfortable in," he explained. Marinette blinked. It had never occurred to her that Nath was polyamorous.

"That's very thoughtful of you, Nath, but…y-you see…the thing is…I can't," she replied vaguely. She could feel his spirit drop.

"Oh…"

"I'm really sorry, but I…I already like someone else, and…it's probably useless anyways because she likes someone else too-"

"She?" Nath questioned. Mari blushed.

"I-I meant he! T-that was a mistake!" She nearly screamed. Nath lifted a skeptical brow.

"Mari, if there's something you'd like to get off your chest, I'm here to listen," he offered. She panicked for a moment before sighed and giving up.

"I…I'm pansexual," she confessed. Nathanael nodded.

"Okay, and I'm guessing you have a crush on a girl."

"Yeah…I…I really like this girl…and she already likes this other girl, but she won't tell me who and it's confusing and also really emotionally draining. I just found out she was a lesbian a week ago or so too," she mumbled.

"A week ago…do you mind telling me who she is?" He asked. Mari blushed.

"I'm too embarrassed to come out and say it, but I can give you hints," she muttered. Nath nodded.

"Uh…you know her. She's blond with green eyes and…s-she's absolutely gorgeous and kind and…h-her voice is really relaxing to listen to and she says the nicest things. I sit behind her in class and…y-you dated her…"

"Jesus Christ," Nathanael sighed.

"I-I'm sorry, Nath! I had no idea you felt this way, a-and me liking Adrienne was totally unplanned!" She cried.

"No, it's okay, Mari. I'm fine," he assured her sincerely.

"I'm really sorry. Would you have been happier if you kept dating her?" She asked. He shook his head.

"Ideally I'd be dating both of you, but clearly that's not gonna happen. I'll live. There's more to life than school, right?" He said a little too cheerfully.

"Yeah…but are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine, Mari. Don't worry about me," he smiled.

"Okay…"

"Seriously, don't feel bad. I could use a break from dating anyways, but you shouldn't give up on Adrienne," he encouraged. Mari blinked in surprise.

"Why?" She asked. Nathanael shrugged.

"Something tells me she might like you too."

 

* * *

 

"Mari, stop stressing out," Alya counseled.

"But what does he mean! How could he possibly know? Is it just a guess?? What information does he contain in his red little head?" Mari groaned and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Mari, he's got an outside view. I dunno, I think she may like you back too. It's getting to that everyone-knows-but-them kinda thing where both of your feelings are evident, but you're also both too scared to do anything about it," Alya explained.

"Ugh! That can't be it, she totally likes someone else and she doesn't feel comfortable telling me! How do I get her to feel comfortable around me? I need to know so I can get rid of her and then comfort Adrienne so she'll fall in love with me," Marinette cried dramatically. Alya rolled her eyes.

"How do you know she likes someone else?" Alya questioned.  
"Because she told me! Ugh, like a week ago or so I found her crying in the bathroom and she said that Nathanael broke up with her because he likes another girl. She wasn't upset because he broke up with her but because she liked the same girl-"

"Nath just confessed to you though."

"-I know! But yesterday she told me it was a misunderstanding and she really likes someone else!" Mari groaned and flopped her head in to her pillow.

"I hate lesbians," she muffled in to her pillow. Alya laughed.

"Calm down, Mari. I'm sure you're just over thinking this. If you want to I could talk with Nino and see what she's been telling him," she offered. Marinette peeked up from her pillow.

"Really?"

"Really."

"Alya, you are an angel!" She grinned and nearly tackled her friend with a hug. Alya laughed, and Mari pulled back with a big smile and a mouthful of hair.

"Ugh!" She groaned pulled the strands out of her mouth.

"This hair is so annoying. Sometimes I just wanna cut it all off," she grumbled.

"Why don't you?" Alya asked.

"Uh…I dunno."

"When you think about it, short hair would be really optimal for you. Times have changed and short hair is really unisex now. It'll help for days you're feeling feminine and masculine," she pointed out. Marinette nodded in agreement.

"I have been feeling a bit more masculine lately…"

"C'mon, my aunt is a killer hair stylist. I think she's free this afternoon," Alya urged as she crawled off Mari's bed.

"Oh, but I don't have any money," Mari pouted.

"Stop acting like I expect you to pay for this shit. It's on the house."

 

* * *

 

     Adrien glared at the settings on his treadmill. He was huffing and puffing, increasing the spread every five minutes or so. Sweat was dripping down his forehead and the back of his neck. His hair would be a big mess had he not secured it in a high ponytail. One of the perks of being rich was having his own work out equipment so he didn't have to go to the gym. If he was like this in public the nearest person would've told him to slow down. He was pushing himself too hard.

     Heavy and whiny breaths left his mouth as he gasped for air and forced himself faster and faster. His body felt over heated and there was a distinct taste of blood in his mouth despite how dry it was. He denied himself rest and water for as long as he possibly could. The burning in his stomach was a mere reminder of why he was doing this. Half a carton of ice cream. Half a carton of sugar and fat and calories. Disgusting calories that riddled him with pain. He could already feel it swelling in his gut late last night, and he hated himself even more through out the day.

     Adrien pushed the speed up one last time when the machine suddenly stopped. He nearly ran in to the frame of the treadmill when he looked over at the plug. Nathalie stood there holding the wire and a bottle of water. She had a small towel draped over her arm and a disappointed, yet concerned, look on her face. Adrien had to hold on to the frame to keep himself from collapsing.

"Wh…why did you d-do that?" He asked.

"Pushing yourself like this is unhealthy Adrienne. You know this is no way to solve your problems," she replied and approached the blond. He looked away and glared at the wall. She handed him the water bottle but he shook his head.

"I don't need it," he panted.

"Yes you do. Water is essential. Don't make me force you," she threatened. Adrien's eyes connected with hers before he took the bottle of water and drank.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"Nothing."

"Don't lie."

"…I ate a lot of ice cream last night," she murmured.

"Why did you eat the ice cream?"

Adrien didn't want to answer.

"I was just craving ice cream."

Nathalie sighed.

"Adrienne, you can talk to me if you need to-"

"I'm fine, Nathalie. You're not my mom," he snapped and grabbed the towel before weakly storming out of the room. Nathalie frowned.

"Who else is gonna worry about you if I don't?"


	8. I'm fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chloé is…Chloé

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been a while since I've updated! School is finally out, but literally I went to Texas to visit my brother right after it got out. I had fun, but now I'm ready to write again :D

     Adrien was tired. His previous workout would take a minimum of two days to recover from. He knew it wasn't the right way to handle things, but he was so boggled up he couldn't handle anything properly. Which was probably why he decided to wear sweatpants, a baggy shirt and a sports bra today. Nothing fancy. Nothing special. Just baggy clothes, messy hair, and left over mascara. Ironically it was the most comfortable he's ever been with his body. He couldn't quite understand why, but he liked how it hid his skinny frame and didn't accentuate his figure.

"I guess this is it," he sighed as he pushed up his glasses.

     He hadn't worn them in months ever since he forgot to order his contacts. Regardless he was thankful he never threw them out. They were thick and black at the top and thin and clear at the bottom. There were no fancy designs on them, and that's what he liked about it. Living an expensive life can get tiring. Having something simple is refreshing.

     When he made his way to the dining room he was surprised to see such a big platter in his usual spot. He looked pensively at the covered plate before uncovering it. The overwhelming smell of food made his stomach simultaneously growl yet feel sick. A frown invaded his face as he looked down at the toast, eggs, bacon, and glass of milk. While it looked appetizing he felt the opposite of want.

"If you're going to train hard, you need to feed yourself," Nathalie spoke. He looked up at her with a hopeless look in his eyes.

"Nathalie, I can't eat this-"

"You have to. If you insist on pushing yourself while you exercise you need to properly fuel yourself. I want you to eat every last bit of this. I don't care how long it takes," she interrupted. Adrien sighed and glared at his food before reluctantly sitting down and grabbing a fork.

"I'm glad that you've made the right choice," she said before turning to walk away. She stopped before the door frame, and looked back to Adrien as he lazily cut up his eggs and dipped the cooked whites in the gooey yolk. He sighed again before eating the food in front of him and resting his cheek on his palm.

"You look very nice today, Adrienne," she told him. Viridescent eyes shifted over to Nathalie as he held his fork between his lips. He lifted a brow as he took the fork from his mouth.

"Uh…thanks?"

"You're welcome. Have a good day at school."

 

* * *

 

"Oh my god, Marinette! You look so cute!"

"So grown up and sophisticated!"

"I like it! You look so tomboyish. That's a compliment of course."

"It's so different, I like it."

"Ugh…what a lesbian," Chloé muttered as she glared at the group of kids crowding around Marinette. She turned her attention back to her phone while Sabrina was on her tip toes trying to get a peek.

"C'mon Chloé, let's just look so we can make fun of her," the redhead begged. Chloé sneered at her phone while she continued to type out her text message.

"Ew. I don't even wanna see it. I'd rather same myself the pain," she replied. Sabrina whined and pouted, prompting Chloé to glare at her friend rather than her phone.

"I'm not stopping you from scaring yourself-"

"Thank you Chloé! I'll be right back!" She shouted as she ran over to join the group. Chloé groaned and shook her head before getting up to leave the classroom.

"Where is she?" She murmured mostly to herself as she scrolled through the many text messages she sent to Adrienne. 

     Just as she stuffed her cellphone back in her pocket she found the other blond making his way up the stairs. At first she didn't recognize her childhood friend. After all, Adrien was a fashion icon and would never be caught dead in sweatpants and slippers. But it was clearly him when she saw his eyes widen through the frames and his cheeks turn bright red.

"C-Chloé!" He nearly shouted. She would definitely have a field day nitpicking him and bragging about how she was finally the most fashionable one (a title she has been trying to win since they were kids. He braced himself for laughter, but was surprised to see concern flicker over her shocked expression.

"Adrienne…what happened?" She asked.

"N-nothing! I just didn't have time t-this morning!" He lied as he gripped the railing tightly. Chloé had known Adrienne for a long time. She could tell what he had done.

"Adrienne, you have to stop pushing yourself like this," she sighed and approached him. He timidly backed away, almost fumbling down the stairs had he not been gripping the railing so tightly.

"I…i-it's no big deal. I was just burning off half a carton of ice cream," he replied. Chloé crossed her arms.

"Well like I can understand wanting to work that off, but you can't keep doing this to yourself," she said. Adrien swallowed hard.

"I'm fine," he lied again.

"Listen, we've been friends ever since we were kids. You can tell me when something is up," she told him. Adrien's brows knit. Could he?

"I-I dunno…" he stuttered. Chloé held both his shoulders.

"Girl, you can tell me anything. There's nothing you can say that would make me hate you," she assured him. He hesitated.

"Well…um-"

"I mean it's not like your a lesbian, and if you were it's not like you have a crush on Marinete. Ugh she annoys me. Thank god we're straight. I heard she's gay," Chloé added. All color left Adrien's face. He laughed nervously.

"Ha ha! Y-yeah thank god we're heterosexual," he said as he took Chloé's hands off his shoulders.

"Um, I-I really need to get in class. I've already missed a lot. See ya!" He forced a smile at her before rushing over to the classroom.

"Okay…bye!" Chloé called as her friend disappeared behind the door.

     Adrien had to take a moment to catch his breath. Damn. That was so stressful. He didn't even notice the crowd of kids until the teacher yelled for everyone to get in to their seats. The boy quickly sat in his usual seat next to Nino and focused his attention to the teacher as she took role. His heart was still hammering in his chest that when Nino tapped his shoulder he couldn't help but jump.

"Crap! Don't scare me like that!" He whisper-shouted. Nino's smile disappeared.

"Whoa dude…are you okay?" He asked. Adrien nodded and pushed his bangs out of his face.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just a little worn out," he murmured.

"Did you go to that club thing?" He asked. Adrien shook his head.

"No…just stayed up a little too late."

"Oh…well, you should ask Marinette to borrow a pen," he told him. Adrien quirked his brow.

"Why? I already have one." He reach in his back to pull it out and show him, but once it was in view Nino took it and bent it in half.

"Oops. Now you don't," he replied and flung it in the trash can. Adrien glared at him.

"What if I wanna ask Alya for a pen?" He challenged. Nino laughed.

"We both know you don't," he said. Adrien sighed and finally turned around to face Marinette.

"Hey, Mari…" he trailed off and froze when he saw her.

     Her famous twin tails were completely missing, leaving her face bright and framed nicely by her bangs. The lack of length gave her rather androgynous look as well as an innocent and adorable touch. He couldn't think of what he was going to say. All he needed to do was ask for a pen, but he was stuck staring at her instead. She blinked down at him with her bright blue eyes and he could feel his cheeks heating up. She was so…beautiful.  
A smile spread across her candy pink lips and his gaze was instantly drawn to her lips. Shit. He couldn't function.

"Did you need something?" She asked. Adrien then realized he was gaping at her. He quickly shut his mouth and blushed even deeper.

"U-uhm…b-borrow a p-pen?" He stuttered. Marinette giggled and reached in her bag to pull out one of her spare pencils.

"Sorry. I don't have a pen, but hopefully a pencil will do," she said as she held it out for him to grab.

"I-it's fine! Perfect actually b-because I c-can't erase ink," he stumbled as he reached to grab it. Marinette giggled again as her fingers brushed against his. His heart was beating faster than ever, and his stomach had a mass of butterflies everywhere.

"You make a good point," she replied.

"Uh…thanks," he murmured.

"You look very nice today, Adrienne," she told him. He blinked at her and then looked down at his sweats and tee-shirt. His hair must've been a mess in his ponytail, and his glasses must've made him look like a total nerd. When he looked back at her she was still smiling.

"T-thank you…I like your haircut," he managed. Marinette beamed.

"Do you?"

"Yeah it looks…r-really cute," he smiled back.

"Thank you, you're so sweet," she said. He nodded.

"No problem…"


	9. Worth it

     Chat Noire was ready to return to La Discothèque de Rose. After the high of chatting with Marinette he felt energized enough to throw on his contacts, puff up his hair, and go out. The smokey eye took a little bit since he hadn't done it in a while, but he managed it regardless. He decided to ditch the veil and instead kept the cat headband before dressing himself. This time he wore a black vest over a black sports bra with leggings and combat boots. 

     The blond grabbed his dark hoodie before sneaking out of his room and making it to the front door. He was almost home-free when-

"Where do you think you're going?"

     Adrien looked over to see Nathalie standing behind him with her arms crossed. Shit.

"Uh…I-I was just gonna go out for a walk," he lied. Nathalie was silent. He sighed.

"I'm…going to this club," he mumured as he pulled out one of his cards from his jacket. She accepted it and read the card.

"I know of this club," she said. Those words filled Adrien with fear. Shit she was gonna figure him out. Nathalie handed him back the card.

"I trust that you know how to get there. I'd advise you don't stay any later than midnight," she said. Adrien blinked.

"You're…letting me go?" He asked. Nathalie nodded.

"Yes."

"Wow…thank you," he spoke but he was still so surprised that she was letting him go to understand much. Nathalie smiled.

"Be safe."

 

* * *

 

"It seems your kitty has returned," Raven whispered in Ladybug's ear. Mari turned her head and noticed the blond chatting away with Tony and Theo. They were fawning over her outfit and seemed to be hitting it off nicely.

"She seems to be making some friends," she hummed as she watched.

"It's kinda odd she hasn't talked to you yet, huh?"

"Not really. Tony can talk a while," she replied.

"Oh, looks like Theo and Tony aren't the only ones interested," Juleka's voice snapped Marinette's attention back to Chat to see a girl approaching the group. She was a regular with dark skin and hair, and she was incredibly gorgeous.

"I know that one. Her name is Violet," Juleka told her. Ladybug was silent as she observed the two girls.

"I've seen her around…" she murmured. She didn't want to admit it, but seeing Violet obviously flirt with Chat Noire made Ladybug feel weird. It was an annoying feeling and she was…uncomfortable with the situation. She watched as Violet touched Chat's shoulder and then played with the ends of her blond hair.

"What the fuck," Ladybug grumbled.

"What, are you jealous?" Juleka teased.

"No! That's just really distasteful," she replied.

"You made out with Chat the first night she was here," Juleka pointed out.

"Whatever she liked it."

"Who's to say she doesn't like Violet?"

"Me." Ladybug stormed away from Raven and walked up to Chat and Violet as politely as possible.

"Chat!" She greeted with a smile on her face. The blond looked over at her and returned the smile. As she was about to reply Ladybug suddenly wrapped her arms around Chat's neck and pressed a quick kiss to her lips.

"Where have you been? I was starting to worry you'd never come back," she said. Violet was pouting as she stepped back from Chat and Ladybug and then cleared her throat. Mari peaked over at Violet.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Was I interrupting something?" She asked innocently.

"No, I was just leaving," Violet said passive aggressively before wandering off. Ladybug rolled her eyes and let go of Chat.

"Thanks a lot. She was actually kind of bothering me," Chat said. Ladybug turned her gaze back to the blond and lifted a brow.

"Really? It looked like you two were flirting," she replied. Chat laughed nervously and scratched the back of her neck.

"Not really…I actually…h-have someone else in mind," she told her. Ladybug blinked. Oh no. Chat wasn't talking about her…right?

"Oh? Who is it?" Ladybug asked.

"Um…I doubt you know her," he spoke shyly looking away. Ladybug noticed Chat was off tonight. She just seemed…distracted or something.

"C'mon, follow me," Ladybug murmured and grabbed Chat's hand.

     The blond didn't have much of a choice but to follow her through the crowd and towards Raven. Adrien blinked at the familiar hazel eyes as Raven smiled at him and nodded their head. He was about to open his mouth to speak only to be tugged passed a door labeled "employees only." He stumbled in tripping over the lip of the door, and blushed when Ladybug giggled. She let go of his hand to close the door.

"Clumsy kitty. Aren't cats supposed to land on their feet?" She teased and walked past him down the hallway. Adrien's eyes darted around the unfamiliar pink walls.

"Uh…I-I guess," he stuttered and quickly caught up with Ladybug.

     There was carpet under his boots, which he found odd, and a couple doors painted to match the walls. It was a rather short hallway that lead to a white door with pink script reading "rester à le mansion". Ladybug lead him right inside, opening the door to reveal a lounge type room. There were couches around a coffee table, and a microwave on a small table in the corner. Under the table was a mini fridge. The coffee table had bowls of candy on it.

"Uh…what's going on?" Adrien asked. Ladybug plopped down on the couch.

"Sit down, let's chat," she invited. She patted the cushion next to her and Adrien cautiously ventured in to the room and sat next to her. He shifted uncomfortably and felt extremely awkward.

"How are you?" Ladybug asked.

"I'm fine," he lied.

"Okay, but how are you really?" She continued and leaned forward to pop an M&M in to her mouth. Adrien bit his nervously.

"I've been better."

"Hm, well you look very nice tonight. I enjoy being able to see your face without that pesky veil in the way," she said and smiled at the blond. Adrien blinked. Right. He wasn't himself tonight. Chat smirked.

"Why thank you, my lady. You look rather nice yourself. Very masculine I see," he replied.

     Ladybug laughed. It was true. Her newly cut hair was pushed back in to a quiff and she wasn't wearing any eyeliner. Her small frame was decorated with a black shirt with red spots and the same red jeans she wore when he first met her. Her feet had black and white sneakers similar to Alya's, and she even had red stud earrings. She looked really hot if Adrien was being completely honest, and he rarely found masculinity attractive on others.

"You're too sweet, mon chaton."

"Mon?" He questioned. Ladybug lifted a brow.

"The feminine form would basically be calling you my pussy…as in vagina," she replied. Adrien took a moment to think about it. She was technically right, but he wasn't concerned about that. He was concerned about why it felt so…right being referred to as male.

"I guess you're right…"

"Does it make you uncomfortable? I didn't mean to-"

"No, it's okay…"

It was more than okay.

"Well…anyways, I'm curious about this girl you mentioned earlier," she changed the subject.

"Right, um…I don't know if I should tell you her name. You might find out who I am," he said. Ladybug chuckled.

"Would it be the end of the world if I did?" She questioned. He looked over at her a smirked.

"I dunno, but it may shock you," he murmured. Ladybugs eyebrows lifted mockingly.

"Oh, you sound confident. Who could possible be hiding underneath all that black shadow?" She spoke softly and leaned closer to him.

"It wouldn't be a secret if I told you, would it?" He smiled and rested his elbow on the back of the couch to fully face her. He was totally in to Mari, but flirting with Ladybug was fun. Almost like practice. Although he doubted he would be this composed around Marinette. She giggled.

"Are you sure you want to keep secrets from me?" She asked.

"Trust me, I'm more myself around you than anyone else," he assured her. 

     Ladybugs eyes flickered down to Chat's lips for a second before returning to his green eyes. She felt the want to kiss her again. Of course her heart was sworn to Adrienne but…Chat was intriguing and naive. That made her innocent, yet she was flirting with her like no tomorrow. It was an odd mixture of feelings. Was it possible to feel desire for two different people? She found her fingers wandering over Chat's knee as she smiled back. The blond didn't pull away. Instead she merely shifted closer. Could she possibly be feeling the same thing?

"I…I kinda want to kiss you again," Chat confessed. Apparently she was. Ladybug let out a small laugh.

"You read my mind."

"…but we both like other people," Chat murmured.

     Adrien felt so nervous. Her fingers on his knee felt warm and comforting, and her eyes looked so crisp and sharp surrounded by the red. She bit her lip and he couldn't help be stare at the pink flesh trapped between her teeth.

"Yeah, we do."

"So that brings up the question…is it worth saving ourselves for someone who is way out of our league? Or do we go for it?" Adrien noticed Ladybug moving closer and so he followed her lead.

"I think the question is rather…is going for it worth not saving ourselves?" She whispered.

     Adrien couldn't stop himself from staring at her lips again. They were enticing, yet familiar. He couldn't quite recall where he's seen such lips before. He found himself reaching out to cup her face and lightly run his thumb over her lip and bit his own lip at the feeling of her hot breath. She moved even closer until they were mere inches apart. Adrien took the chance and softly pressed his lips against hers. It was like lighting the first sparkler at dusk on the Fourth of July. Her warm skin was like the summer breeze, and her lip balm tasted like summer strawberries. When he pulled back she smiled.

"It's worth it."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to say thank you to everyone reading this story of mine. I'm really proud of it and I really like it. It confuses me as to why it's not as popular as a lot of my other stories, and I hope it catches on soon. This is really one of my favorites :/


	10. Confusing

     Adrien gasped for breath as he hunched over the trash can. More spurts of air was violently forced from his throat as he gagged again and tasted the disgusting stomach acid rolling through his mouth. A short sob left his lips before he wiped the last bit away with his arm. It smelled gross, and made him want to throw up again. His body ached, and his stomach was throbbing along with his head. He grasped it in hopes to stop the pain before collapsing against the wall and siting down to catch his breath. His green eyes were trained on the treadmill he had been using again. Once again he pushed too far.

     After a while he lost track of time. He had no idea how long he was staring at the machine, but no matter how long it was the chalky taste of throw up was still lingering in his mouth. He eventually had to nudge the trash bin away from himself because of the smell, and held his legs to his chest. Tears started to roll down his cheeks as his head continued to throb. He squeezed his eyes shut. What did he do to deserve this pain?

"Adrienne?"

     His eyes snapped open and he looked up to see Nathalie. The assistant watched as all color left his already pale face and then looked to the trash can next to him. Nathalie frowned, and Adrien could only continue to cry silently. She crouched down to be eye level with Adrien.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"I…did too much again," she murmured. Nathalie sighed.

"Did something happen?"

"I don't wanna talk about it."

"That's okay…but let's get you cleaned up so you can rest. You're not going to school tomorrow," she told him. Adrien nodded as the assistant stood up and offered him a hand. He accepted with the hand he didn't wipe his vomit away with and weakly stood to his feet.

"Thanks…Nathalie."

"Thank me later. Let's get you some water."

 

* * *

 

"No. My daughter will not be posing in a bikini for your magazine! I'm willing to allow sports wear and…I don't care if she's 16! She's still under my authority. I am her manager and I will not allow you to sexualized my daughter! In her contract is a list of athletic gear she can wear. I will absolutely not allow something that low cut and exposing…I've told you tankinis are okay as long as the bottom has a skirt…yes she'll need a cover up with a one piece. Do you not realize how disgusting teenage boys are? The moment she's in anything less than shorts and a tank top they violate the magazine like rabbits!"

     Adrien flinched at his father's loud voice. He hated hearing him say "her" and "she" and "daughter". He hated the idea of wearing any kind of swimwear. He hated everything. His head felt like it was spinning. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to eavesdrop on this conversation. He quickly turned around to walk away only to smash right in to Nathalie. His body was still weak and frail from his sickness yesterday that Nathalie had to catch him before he stumbled backwards.

"N-Nathalie! I'm sorry," he whispered.

"What are you doing here, Adrienne?" She asked.

"Um…n-nothing. I was just…walking to the kitchen," he lied.

"Then let's go," she said. He opened his mouth to protest, but quickly decided against it. Maybe a snack was a good idea.

"Okay," he obliged and followed her down the hall. 

     It was silent except for the click of Nathalie's heels and the the soft taps of Adrien's converse. When they got to the kitchen Nathalie sat at the counter while Adrien rummaged through the fridge to pull out some caviar. He got the crackers to go with it from the cupboard and then a small bowl and spoon. He set his stuff on the counter and started to prepare his simple snack.

"So, how's school going?" Nathalie asked. Adrien looked up at her. He always felt weird talking to his father's assistant. She felt more like a babysitter than just another employee. Sometimes it was annoying, but other times it was rather helpful and enjoyable. Sometimes she acted like a friend.

"It's fine…" he murmured.

"Only fine?"

"I mean, my grades are still good. My friends still talk to me. Not much has changed," he explained as he scooped the caviar in the small bowl he got out.

"Oh? Didn't you break up with Nathanial a few weeks ago?" She asked.

"Uh, y-yeah, but I'm over him now," he told her.

"Your father told me about why you ate all that ice cream last week. He said you like a guy who doesn't like you back?" She spoke as he placed the caviar back in the fridge. He returned to the counter and started piling the caviar on a cracker.

"Uh…yeah. That's why," he mumbled and shoved the salty snack in his mouth before preparing another.

"Do you mind telling me who it is?" She inquired. Adrien froze staring down at his second cracker. Every nerve in his body was telling him to run. Telling him to get out of this situation. Telling him that no one could ever understand so no one should know anything about him. He looked up at her.

"Um…i-it's just a random guy I thought was…attractive," he lied. Nathalie was silent for a while before she sighed. Adrien ate the second cracker and prepared a third.

"You know you can tell me anything, right? I do care about you, Adrienne," she said. He stopped mid-bite and blinked at her. Sadness suddenly filled the blond as he set down his half a cracker and wiped his mouth.

"That's very sweet of you, but…I can't even tell myself anything," he told her sadly.

"How much did you hear?" She asked.

"Huh?"

"Of your father's phone call."

"Oh…I-I heard him say I can't wear a bikini for a shoot and other stuff…"

"Good. I-" she was cut off when her phone beeped in her pocket. She quickly checked it and sighed.

"I'm sorry, Adrienne, you'll have to excuse me. You're father needs some help with your schedule," she announced and stood up.

"Please, don't hesitate to find me if you need someone to talk to," she told him. He nodded.

"Thanks, Nathalie…"

     She smiled once and walked out of the kitchen leaving Adrien alone. He starred down at his snack for a minute before continuing to eat and finish it up. After he cleaned up his mess he retreated to his room and laid down in his bed. He sighed staring up at the ceiling as the last glimmering bits of sunlight glided over it. Loneliness dawned on him as he found himself craving for someone's, anyone's, company. Someone to talk to even though he didn't know what he wanted to talk about. All he knew was that he wanted to just talk and talk uncensored. He wanted to talk about what was on his mind, but it was hard to know what that was without expressing it out loud.

     Adrien turned to his side on his bed and kicked off his converse as he pulled out his phone. He had a couple new messages from Nino and when he checked FaceBook Nathanael had posted another artwork. He liked it and continued to scroll until he found a picture of Marinette smiling widely next to Nino on his screen. Alya had posted it with the caption "fro-yo with my peeps!" along with the sparkly heart emoji. It was posted fifteen minutes ago, and it had about sixteen likes. It appeared that school was now out and his friends were free from their prison. She looked so happy…

     Adrien couldn't get over how much he absolutely adored Marinette. Those bright blue eyes had so much light in them. Her wide smile and rosy cheeks filled him with a sense of joy, yet it quickly dissipated as he reminded him of how lonely he felt. He wanted to be with them and talk and be friends, but…he was scared.

     He sighed and clicked off his phone before turning over again. His brain kept jumping to a couple nights ago with Ladybug…fuck she was so alluring. Adrien was certain by now that he only liked girls and the more feminine appearance, but Ladybug didn't look one bit like a Lady. She looked…hot. With her baggy clothes and pushed back hair. He loved how cute yet sharp she looked. Everything about that night made him even more confused. Mon chaton…Ladybug…goddamn this was difficult. A sigh escaped his mouth before he turned on his back and held a pillow to his chest.

     Her lips…they felt so soft. Kissing her felt better than kissing any…boy? Or maybe kissing Ladybug was better than kissing anyone? He was still yet to kiss Marinette, and it killed him. Who was this friend of hers that liked him? Why didn't she like him? Was she even gay or…interested in "girls"? All he knew was that Chloé thought she was gay, and Chloé wasn't always right. Then again she wasn't always wrong though. Everything was so confusing…he felt at war with himself. Why did all these labels matter anyways? Why did it matter what he looked like or what people called him? Hell, why was he stressing out so much about Marinette being a girl? He should just be able to like someone without worrying about what they look like or what they label themselves as. He was tired…and lonely.

     As if an omen from God himself, Adrien's phone lit up with a new message on it. He quickly snatched it off his bed and opened the message. His eyes widened and his heart nearly skipped a beat.

Nino: hey, I'm at fro-yo with the girls. Marinette says she was worried about you. Wanna join us?


	11. Oh no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Has it been a while I can't remember

"Adrienne!"

     The sound of his friends greeting him instantly made him feel better. He smiled and waved as he approached the table Nino, Alya, and Marinette were sitting at outside the frozen yogurt shop. They're cups were empty and that filled him with relief. Maybe they wouldn't make him get a cup of his own.

"H-hey guys," he stuttered a little. Mostly because he was still a bit tired, but also because Marinette was grinning so widely at him.

"Where have you been, dude? We've been worried about you," Nino asked as he took a seat at the table.

"Oh, um…I had a stomach ache this morning and Nathalie insisted I stayed home," he told them.

"Aw, that's too bad. How are you feeling now?" Alya inquired.

"Better…but I don't want any ice cream or anything," he said.

"That's okay, we totally understand," Nino assured him. He nodded and couldn't resist looking over at Marinette. Her blue eyes darted down to her cup and her cheeks were pink. It was pretty obvious she had been staring…

"What did I miss at school today?" Adrien asked.

"Not much really. It was a good day to miss because pretty much nothing happened," Nino answered.

"That's good," Adrien nodded. He looked at Marinette again. She looked at her cup. It was…suddenly awkwardly silent.

"Um-"

"Well! Would you look at the time! I need to skedaddle!" Alya announced looking down at her bare wrist as if she was checking a watch.

"Alya, you said you were free-"

"Sorry Mar, but I totally forgot about this important thing I have," Alya interrupted.

"Now that you mention it. I need to skedaddle too!" Nino said standing up. Alya stood up with him.

"So sorry to bail on you guys. And just when Adrienne got here," Alya said with false pity. Marinette glared at her best friend. Adrien was confused.

"It's not very fair to Adrienne…"

Oh no.

"Mari! Why don't you hang out with Adrienne for a little while since she just got here?" Nino suggested.

     Adrien cringed at the word "she". He was starting to notice how much he fucking hated it. At least when it was used referring to him. Mari blushed.

"Um…s-sure. I guess," she muttered and stared down at her empty bowl.

"Wonderful! Nino and I will get the fuck out of here and you two can enjoy each other's company!" Alya grinned and tugged on Nino's arm. Before Adrien or Marinette could respond the two had ran off and out of sight leaving them alone. They looked at each other and blushed before looking away. This was gonna be difficult.

     Marinette mindlessly scrapped her spoon against her empty bowl. She was totally gonna kick Alya's ass the next time she saw her. The air was thick and heavy with discomfort and just…plain awkwardness. What if Nath told Adrienne she liked her? What if she figured it out by herself because Marinette is so fucking obvious? What if she had straight up accidentally told it to her face without realizing it? Damn that sounded like something she would do. Mari was so caught up in her panic that she barely realized Adrienne had said something. She looked up.

"What was that?" She asked.

"Um…I-I said I really like your new haircut," Adrienne spoke shyly. Mari blinked and then turned bright red.

"Oh, t-thank you! It was last minute really, but I like it quite a bit," she said.

"You're…really brave for doing that. I could never cut my hair shorter than my shoulders. My dad would totally freak," the blond replied looking at her hands as she fiddled with her bracelets.

     Marinette took her time to appreciate the golden waves cascading down the side of Adrienne's face. It was curly and shiny and healthy. She bet it smelled good too. If only she could reach out and gently comb her fingers through those gorgeous locks. It went so perfectly with her skin and her fringe swept over her face in such an angelic way. Mari had to blink to break the spell Adrienne always managed to put her under. Damn she was fucking gay.

"Your hair is…"

Gorgeous? Devine? Pristine?

"…neat."

Neat.

"A-and I think it looks really good long, but if you want it short hair grows back so…it's not that big of a deal," she finished. Way to go Mari.

"I guess you have a point, but my dad doesn't know I'm…a-and I haven't told him so if I cut my hair he might suspect…" Adrienne told her.

"Oh, right…do you want to cut your hair short?" She asked. The blond shrugged.

"Maybe. I'm not sure what I want these days…"

     His head was spinning in circles. Why did chopping off all his hair sound so attractive to him? As if shedding even half of his length would make him that much happier? It was so strange to think about, but now it was obvious. He wanted to cut it much shorter than half.

"I think you would look very cute with short hair," Marinette said cheerfully. Adrien returned his attention to her and smiled.

     She was amazing. Her eyes sparkled like jewels and her cheeks were so flushed like a peach. Everything about her screamed sweet from her candy blue eyes to her sugary smile. He could feel himself want to kiss her again. If she was any closer he probably would if he lost track of himself.

"Thanks, Mari. That's very…n-nice," he stuttered as she shifted her chair closer. She smelled like caramel.

"Y'know…Nathanael was talking to me the other day," she said. Adrien's eyes widened. Oh no.

"W-what did he say?"

"He told me that he likes me," she told him. Shit. His felt face heat up.

"W-wow! Um, what did you say?" He asked.

     Mari paused for a moment to take a moment to watch Adrienne's body language. She was obviously nervous, and stiff with wide eyes. She was clutching the sides of the chair and slightly leaning away from her. Her leg was bouncing and restless, but her gaze was locked on Mari.

"I told him I like someone else," she answered simply. Adrien let out a deep breath he wasn't aware of holding.

"Hopefully he took it ok-"

"It was kind of disappointing if I'm gonna be honest. Him telling me he likes me," she interrupted. Adrien blinked.

"Uh…why?" He was on edge again. Mari leaned her elbow on the table and sighed.

"Well…you told me that about that misunderstanding, remember?"

"Y-yeah…we like totally separate girls," he stuttered. Mari bit her lip. Was the little hint Nath gave her worth the risk? She looked back to Adrien. He was leaning closer now in anticipation.

"When he confessed it meant that you don't like me…and that was really _disappointing_ ," she said.

     Adrien froze. Holy shit. Did that mean she wants him to like her? Does she like him too? If she liked him back then who was this other girl who liked him? What was even going on?

"U-um…"

"Because if you did like me I'd actually be really happy about that," she continued. She…wait…

"And in all honesty when I told Nathanael I like someone else I was talking about you."

     Adrien's eyes widened. Marinette…likes him. She likes him. She was telling him that she likes him. This was not a drill.

"Mari…" was all he could say. She blushed. All of her previous confidence seemed to melt away.

"I-I mean…um…shit. I-I'm sor-"

     Marinette couldn't finish her sentence because Adrien's lips were suddenly planted over hers. He didn't know what he was doing. All he knew was that it felt so right to do it. It felt better than kissing Ladybug the other night. It felt better than the expensive massages his father booked for his birthdays. It felt better than wearing a sports bra. She felt better than anything and everything in the world.

     When he pulled away her eyes were wide with shock. He still took a little while to realize what he had done, and then the panic started to set in. Adrien kissed Marinette…holy shit. He quickly stood up from his chair. His face was beat red.

"Uh I-I have to go," he announced suddenly.

"What?" Mari asked.

"Uh home. I gotta go," he repeated and pushed his chair in.

"I'll see you later…bye!" He called as he started to run away. Mari watched him run off in to the street and then watched his usual limo follow him.

"Bye…"


End file.
